This week has been especially full, but perhaps not with your typical holiday fanfare. We have been recording ther last songs for our album which were not as developed as those we have previously recorded. So as Dan was laying in guitar, I was still reworking rhyme patterns and experimenting with alternate melodies. It made for some fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants sessions, which as you know by now, isn’t my favorite outfit. Also, we were double-booking between the two houses as Dan had already moved in to “the woods” but the kids were finishing their last week of school which left us stranded at “the view.” And of course, while he was working his day job, I was packing and unpacking, loading into storage, making dump runs and trying to get the not-so-pleasant view scrubbed clean and erased from our memories.

But now here I sit…at “the woods.” There are empty and full suitcases still piled by the sofa and the empty boxes are building a fort over the ottoman. Today’s task was to get some shelves for organizing the details. I am a OCD organizer and fitting a big house into a little apartment requires lots of bins and canisters and shelves, all stacked biggest to smallest and labeled alphabetically. My unpacking had somewhat reached a roadblock until I could devise a working plan for some storage spaces. But with our hectic schedule this week, the suitcases have sat unemptied and the pantry has remained spread across the kitchen among tupperware, stationery and random utensils. I felt a tad guilty that at each crossing of our paths I was submitting another Maintenance Request Form to Dan. He’s a busy guy. So it was time to ‘man up’ and get ‘er done. So off I set to Lowe’s tonight to buy shelving, with my measurements in my pocket and my hammer on my hip. Giddy-up!

But buying them was going to be the easy part. The first lesson I learned was to think the entire project through while at the supply store. I foresaw needing L-brackets and screws and even anchors (sizing was a guess though), but I didn’t anticipate that the length of screws that I bought would drill all the way through the shelf (and into the kitchen floor). Oops.

Secondly, I didn’t realize that by buying the more aesthetic laminate shelves, that I would bust a couple fingers trying to get the L-brackets attached. Why, WHY, I ask, is a drill so tricky to work?? If I applied even and consistent pressure, the screw would start twisting all drunk and crazy and then fly across the floor as my drill DUIs into my shelf board. Grrr. But as I put elbow grease behind the drill, I quickly stripped out the unscrewed-in-screws leaving a molten layer of metal chips on the bit. Grrr!

Thirdly, it is amazing how much of a two person job it is to hang a couple shelves! And I would have welcomed another person. Or a level. Yes, I was eyeing it, and this from under the shelf where I was struggling and wrestling to hold it up with my head while whacking plastic retard anchors and using the aforementioned demon-possessed drill. And meanwhile the kids are running and crashing and giggling into an uproar while playing tag around the house… GRR!

It was somewhere between the first finished shelf that was NOT level (shocker) and the child who knocked over the entire box of baking soda onto the kitchen floor (already covered with tools and metal shards) that my head began to explode. Here I am – contorted on top of the washer with a shelf balanced on my forehead and an extension cord tangled in my legs – trying – TRYING – to get another stupid, stubborn screw into the wall. They just kept spiralling out of control (which is why three or more screws will stay lodged behind the washer) and no matter how assertive my technique or how even my form, I could. not. get. it. in. GRRRR!

Then, all of the sudden, I discovered a magic button. Hmmm. It seems that somewhere along the way, I accidentally toggled it and reversed the direction of the drill, which suddenly made the insanity… logical. And as I continued to push and pull and wrench and wriggle those shelves into a forced function, I wondered how often in life I have applied my most excellent efforts and pulled every last trick out of the bag trying to make life work. Only to find out that I was pushing it in the wrong direction. And when you suddenly stand back from the sweat and growling, you spot the magic button. And the insanity falls into perfect order.

Hmmm.

It’s a great theory and I think it holds weight in the scheme of life and God and how we as humans interact with Him. But two hours and a couple bruises later, I began to alphabetize the baking ingredients on the new tipsy shelves. I was only to G (graham cracker crumbs) when the anchors began pulling away from the walls. (G is also for GRRR!!!)

The only thing left to say is that I must accept that with intense creativity comes a dirth of all things mechanical and electrical and practical. I have returned the pantry to its scattered collage across the counters. The tupperware topples over the dryer and the incoming Christmas cards are lost among extension cords and Swiffer pads and boxes of hangers. Oh, and I filled out a new Maintenance Request Form.